Sunday 28 April 2013

An Explanation

Ok, first off, I'm very sorry for not posting more over these past few weeks. IRL problems got in the way, including illness, exams and camping. From now on, I should have a little bit more time to do some of this stuff, so I'll be able to devote a little bit more time to this blog. I hope you understand, and I hope you enjoy the blog.

Secondly, thanks to my girlfriend for the awesome artwork for the background. I decided to go with something other than the default templates, and so an image is a creative and great way of making the whole blog really stand out from everything else.

Thirdly, I decided that doing the big Slenderseries would be far too obvious, and too easy, so I'm going to go for the more obscure ones. I'll be searching around places like Slender Haven (slenderhaven.com, I would check it out, it's brilliant) for some of the less universally known web series. That means a few things. Firstly, no more reviews of any of the big three vlog series. That means no EMH, no Tribe Twelve and no Marble Hornets. I may do the big blogs, I haven't decided yet, but I definitely will not review any more of those three. I will watch them, and I recommend watching them, but no reviews. Yes, I did just become Slender hipster.

I will also be doing video games, starting with Slender The Eight Pages, and possibly moving onto Slender The Arrival depending on whether I have enough pairs of trousers to get through it all.

Most importantly, it means that the order in which I do things will change. So, coming up next is a review the first bit of Let's Play of Slenderman's Shadow, from someone who decided to make their LP a little bit different. This will be followed by I Am Stardust.

Thank you for reading, understanding and (hopefully) enjoying the blog. Come back next time for Let's Play of Slenderman's Shadow. Sleep tight, don't let the Slenderbugs bite!

Monday 8 April 2013

The Tutorial

Hello once again, and welcome to another review from AmateurEnthusiast. This time, I'll be reviewing The Tutorial, my first blog review and one of the best blogs I've seen.

The Tutorial chronicles a man known as M, the first of the Runners, as they late came to be known. M decided to teach people how to run from Slenderman, and how to get away from him. He made the three basic rules:

1. Get up high. Apparently, Slenderman is confused by humans being taller than him, and getting onto a rooftop or somewhere high (above two stories) will make him read you as not human.

2. Keep moving. It's easier for Slenderman to get you if you stay in one place, so you need to stay on the move so he doesn't track you down as easily.

3. Keep your eyes open. He can't get you if you're looking right at him, or he thinks you're looking at him. Masks work, because he's tricked by the eye holes on them, even if they're on the back of your head. Cameras do not, because all he does is ruin the film.

The blog does a great job of making it seem real. This is a man who's deep in shit, who has been on the run for a long time, who is actively running away from Slenderman. The imagery conjured up when someone dies is incredibly intense, and contributes to the realism of the blog. He's not actively investigating Slenderman, like in some blogs, but he's running from him. It makes you feel incredibly sympathetic to his ordeal.

The blog runs off the SomethingAwful origin story, that he was created by the internet and conjured into existence by our imaginations. The more you read into Slenderman, in this universe at least, the more likely you are to be infected. How M got into it, and his years of running experience that he shares via the blog, is intricately laid out, for the reader to form M's background through his posts. Again, this makes him seem more human, like an actual person blogging and not a man telling a story through the medium of blogging.

Unlike other blogs, however, he doesn't believe that every single Slenderseries is real. He will leave small comments on which blogs he thinks are real and which ones he thinks aren't, showing how someone dealing with Slenderman would react to other Slenderb/vlogs. This is another interesting little twist to make M like a real human being, and not a fictional character. All of this adds together to make one of the best characters seen in the Slendermythos.

All of the characters are very well done, each one made realistic. There's Warner, who only gets infected after meeting M, and teaches M why the woods aren't safe (by getting killed in them). There's Sam, who had his own theories on how to beat Slenderman, and was already pretty insane when M met him (and he also met a gruesome end). Every character serves to tell a story, almost to prove how long M has been on the run, and exactly what Slenderman can do to you, physically and mentally.

Slenderman himself is one of the best Slendermen I've seen. He's like a monstrous predator, tearing people apart in violent and gory ways. However, he also has the intelligence of a predator, a lion or a tiger. He's easily tricked, due to not being accustomed to humans, and not being nearly as intelligent. Wearing a mask and getting up high is one of the easiest ways to get away. He can, however, get into rooms and just move you from place to place, or get you when you least expect it. He has his own ways of beating humans, just like they have their own ways of getting away.

Confrontations with Slenderman are used sparingly enough to make them all incredibly effective, but frequently enough so that we know that M is in mortal danger. There's none of the badass cocky attacking Slenderman, as some Slenderb/vlogs include, but he runs. He runs, he follows the rules, and he manages to get away. Those unaware of the rules are not so lucky, which highlights how effective M's methods are. He can't beat Slenderman, no-one can, but he can run and he can hide from him. That, in itself, is very badass.

All in all, it's one of the best blogs out there today. I would totally recommend reading it, as it is absolutely fantastic. The characters are believable, M is one of the best characters in any Slender Mythos series, and Slenderman is superbly done. It's incredible. There is a follow up, as it ends with a kid called Bondie finding him, and I will track it down (I had it, but I lost it), because I suspect it is just as good.

Thank you all for reading. Next up, the beginning of Tribe Twelve and Seeking Truth. Happy reading, and follow the three rules!

Friday 5 April 2013

Sims Saga: Entry #1 Market to Entry #25 Where Am I

Sims Saga is a very interesting series. It is taken almost entirely from in game footage, a style which is highly reminiscent of Ben Drowned, and pays several tributes to the Slenderman Mythos from inside Sims 2 Apartment Life.

The story goes that an unmarried couple, Casey and Jen, make a 'post apocalyptic challenge' LP on Sims 2 Apartment Life. Apparently the main character was given the disk by his mom, who found it at a garage sale (which is already a bad sign). Our good friend Ol Faceless starts messing with the game from there on in.

The first two vids showcase the style of the vlog. First off, there are a hell of a lot of glitches and bugs in this game. Lag, flashing menus, a window keeps popping up, and then the relationships and motives crash. How they managed to put those glitches in there is beyond me, but apparently it's very hard to do right. Top marks for programming, and believability of the actors, from the start.

Entry 3 contains a not-so-subtle shout out to Marble Hornets, and more motive crashing. At this point, it's pretty clear that something's wrong, especially the Operator Symbol painting. Slenderman shows up on occasion, but you have to be paying real close attention to the background to notice when it arrives. The cameos of Tall, Dark and Slender are brilliantly subtle, and usually signal that bad shit is going down.

From there on in, it gets weirder and weirder. They randomly die, the Grim Reaper takes a shit in their toilet, Camtasia crashing, reversed colouring from the flipcam he uses to record whatever he can salvage, and numerous attempts to video Slenderman. When it allows itself to be recorded, it really starts to mess with them. The style of the audio and visual distortions isn't as ear-rapey as other Slenderseries, but they are creepy, and they are well done. 

That being said, it's not a scary series. If you want to be scared shitless, this isn't the series for you at all. It is a brilliantly done and easily lovable series, however, and I have fallen for it. The idea of Slenderman fucking up the game is very original, and the way it fucks up the game is superb.

He empties their house of everything in Empty, leaving only the phone, with only one contact. Obviously, that contact is Slenderman, so they call him. What they are treated too, over two episodes, is bursts of static, distortion and what sounds like a TV growling, which makes for a horrifying pair of episodes.

They come back and try to talk to him in 'thexend.avi'. The distortions here are eye-rapey, and it's hard to tell what's going on at all, but that just makes it creepier, as Casey madly clicks buttons and Jen desperately wants to get out of the room. It appears to be messing with the players, the game and the videos. The horror sets in as you reach an epiphany: could he mess with the viewer as well?

Then it goes into the real world with 'backyard.avi' and the subsequent three clips. It goes downhill from here, as it's way too dark and pixellated, which makes it impossible to see what's going on. At the first part of backyard.avi, the main two characters and their friends are killing a moth in what is an utterly pointless little clip. They could have shown them drinking beer or eating something, but instead they show them killing a pest with an electric racquet. It's stupid, needless, and it detracts from the video. The other three videos appear to show cultists surrounding the guy, or something, but I really can't tell.

Return and Where Am I are a return to form for the series. It's just Casey now, and the lot is even more glitched than before. Tiles are missing and the character is laid out on the floor as the game crashes. Even the loading screens are broken, with creepy music being played and Jen's face being distorted. It puts the creepy right back up again.

All in all, it's a great slenderseries when it focuses on the game. It hooks you in from the start, and does not let go. The real life section isn't great, but hopefully there will be no more real life sections, and the rest of the footage will be in game footage.

Up next for review: The Tutorial and the start of Tribe Twelve. Hope you enjoyed this review, leave  feedback in the comments, and sit back and wait for my next review!


Thursday 4 April 2013

everymanHYBRID: Introduction to Joke's Over

This is my first review on this blog, and it will be of the first chunk of everymanHYBRID. I hope you guys enjoy!

To start off, the first few fitness videos are not that great. Most of it is common sense, and some of the Slenderman shots are far too obvious, and amateurish. To start off, it looks pretty bad. It does kick into gear later, but the first impressions are not good at all. The fitness bits are mainly common sense, and it's far too easy to spot Ol' Faceless in the background, especially when Vince stares straight at it whilst he's pushing the car.

Of course, this makes a neat twist when they reveal that it was a fake Slendy, and the real one showed up at some point. It also makes for an interesting game, trying to guess which Slendy was real and which was fake.

'...', and the premise of 'hidden' videos that the cast can't see, is another creepy plot twist. The series is almost immediately propelled upwards in viewer estimations because of this particular twist, and the implications of what this unseen hacker can put up. First off, the man shows that Evan quite clearly has Slendersickness, and is obsessed with knives. It's probably hinting at something further down the line, as he's already acting incredibly weird.

Healthy Eating shows the first definitive Slenderman appearance. The weird head bobbing is far scarier than it should be, as is the way he disappears after the door closes. It's a fabulous entrance, and just as good an exit from our old pal Slendy. The levels of what-the-fuckery are high, and the way he gets so close to the boys before making his presence known is terrifying.

The characterisation of all of the cast is well done, and is showcased by A Day In The Life. It's a nice little trip through some woods, almost a breather episode (even though I'm sure I spotted something tall, dark and Slender in the background a few times). It shows off the acting talent of all of the people involved, from Ryan's general Pokemon love to Evan and Vince's bromance.

The Sleeping and Dreams trilogy isn't exactly necessary, other than the showing off of the weird shrine and Evan's Slenderdreams. It fits with the fitness and health series, but they wouldn't have lost too much without them, really.

'---' shows a lot of stuff, and it's hard to make sense of most of it. Other than Vince making Jeff continue, and Evan filming himself pretending to be Freddy Kruger (he's already insane), not a whole lot makes sense. The random shots from A Day In The Life don't exactly help, although it does look creepy.

Slushpops And Surprises doesn't show us too much, other than a sneak preview at what is to come in the fitness series, a creepy birthday card, and something about a 'tragic hero'. The end message is really weird (I assume it's hidden, but I'm not 100%), but it doesn't draw many emotions from the viewer. That makes me automatically think that it's some form of foreshadowing, but I can't be too sure.

Self Defense is another return to the health and fitness series, and I'm nearly totally sure that there's some kind of foreshadowing there. The lessons on fighting, and Evan being a martial arts teacher are details that are probably going to help the boys in some form during the series. There's some funny moments in it, and the quality of the fitness series appears to have improved (pretty sure that contest has ended by now), and it shows that the boys are letting Slendy get them down.

Joke's Over is where the series really gets it's arse in gear, and what a way to do it. The quality of the distortions, and Slenderman, is brilliant. He almost seems to roar to the camera as he appears. Evan laughing as the liquid (more on that in a moment) spills out of the bag is terrifying, and the defining insane moment for Evan.

By the way, the liquid is not blood. In the original mythos, Slenderman melted his victims and placed that liquid into bags, rather than just the organs. This is what appears to be the end result. With that in mind, the quality of that effect looks much better.

So far, it's a great series. It's engaging, the characters are all believable, Slenderman looks epic and there's some really creepy shit going on. I love it already.

Next time, the first few episode of the Sims Saga and The Tutorial. I hope you liked this review, stay tuned for more.

Tuesday 2 April 2013

A change of name

You may have noticed that I just changed the name of this blog. I believe that it requires a little bit of an explanation, so here you go:

I changed the name because I found the Slendy Review blog (which I totally recommend you check out, by the way, because it's pretty cool(slendereview.blogspot.co.uk)), and I didn't want to seem like I was setting myself up for direct competition with them. Mainly because I'll probably lose.

Also, it is an experiment. I want to see if anyone will actually read something that I write. The first idea for this was not 'a slenderman review blog' but 'a review blog' of some sort. Slenderman happened to be the first thing that I thought to review, just because I thought it hadn't been done before (I know that it has now, obviously, and I feel a little stupid).

If you have been reading the first few posts, thank you. Just because I've found someone who has done/is doing this, doesn't mean I'm giving up. There will be reviews, don't worry guys.

So, coming up in the next week or two is my first review, which will be of (what I have watched of) everymanHYBRID (from the start to Joke's Over). I'll be doing each of my reviews in segments, so you can track my thought processes over the series, and also because watching it all at once will make me shit bricks.

Happy reading guys!

Sunday 31 March 2013

Introduction to Slenderman

For all of those that don't know, (and it is integral to some of the things I will be reviewing that you do know) Slenderman is a character originally created by the SomethingAwful forums. He originally spawned from a "Let's Create Paranormal Images" thread. He was added in to a few of them, and then he sort of overtook the thread.

From that, an icon of creepypasta was born.

Slenderman is different in most of his appearances. What people can agree on, however, is that he's a tall, faceless thing wearing some sort of business suit. He has freakishly long limbs, and sometimes has tentacles, depending on what you're watching (if it's Japanese, he probably does). His preferred targets are usually children, but he will go after adults if the plot demands it. His main powers include severe mindfuckery, breaking most cameras and an incredible ability to manipulate areas around him. He can either teleport or move really fast, depending on what you're watching.

His MO is usually mindfucking his victims into writing weird notes all over the place, and then either killing them or taking them to his pocket dimension for super happy fun times. Those super happy fun times usually end with him placing your organs into bags for other people to find. Again, this depends entirely on what you're watching. Sometimes he just straight up murders them, sometimes he adds his own special twist to the recipe.

His origin story is usually left entirely unexplained. The cryptic hints that the viewer is given vary wildly, from being a pedophile that was killed by stretching him from a tree, to an entirely meta perspective that we created him by writing on the SA forums, and that we basically doom ourselves by reading up about him. This twist is so meta it's like the Doritos Taco flavoured Doritos.With less Doritos.

So, that's the basics on Slenderman. Essentially, he's a child killing, mind raping, camera breaking, snappy dressing, tall, faceless motherfucker who cannot be harmed through normal methods, or at all. The exact description will change based on the creepypasta you are viewing, but it's essentially the same beast.

Coming up next time, what I've watched of everymanHYBRID so far (which is very little, just to warn you).

The Slender Review Hub is open for business!

Hey guys,

After seeing and reading some of the Slenderman stuff, and I decided that we need one place to review and check out all of this. The ARGs, the blogs, the vlogs and the videogames. I decided to create one myself, as a little project, something to do.

This is by no means the official place, neither is it definitive. If you have conflicting opinions for any of the work that I will be reviewing, please tell me in the comments. I value your opinion just as much as my own, so I'd love to hear what you guys have to say about it.

Also, as much as I'd love to, I will not be reviewing Marble Hornets. I have watched every single episode up to now, and my views will be tainted by the fact that what looked scary at the start of the series looks fucking hilarious now. Still, it is a great series, and I would recommend you go watch it, as it is one of the definitive Slenderman projects.

That being said, I have started reading a few blogs, and watching a few vlogs, just to get a feel for what I'm about to review. If you have any recommendations, please leave them in the comments and I'll go check them out.

My list to review so far:
The Tutorial (getuphigh.blogspot.co.uk)
Seeking Truth (openthedoorandyouwillfindme.blogspot.co.uk)
Dark Harvest (www.youtube.com/user/DarkHarvest00)
Just Another Fool (jafool.wordpress.com)
I Am Stardust (youandthestarsareone.blogspot.co.uk)
Sims Saga (www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL53E3BC0FC02E581C&feature=plcp)
Caught Not Sleeping (Lots of channels so I'll put up the video list from Wikidot instead (http://caughtnotsleeping.wikidot.com/uploads))
The Scarlett House (http://www.youtube.com/user/TheScarlettHouse/videos?view=0)
Let's Play Slenderman's Shadow (http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtBvVb99cf6S_j63sPFpKRLaMt2fcqdQb)

I will check out all recommendations that you give me.

My reviews will be honest, so don't expect glowing praise for everything and anything. Don't expect scathing criticism for everything either. I'll try and balance it out, unless it looks really shit or really amazing.

I will be reviewing every series as I read/watch them. I will put the name of the latest post/video that I have watched in the title of each review, so that you know how far along in the series I actually am.

In the coming weeks or so, I will put up an introduction to Slenderman, as well as the first evermanHYBRID review. Thanks for reading!